redheads rock

Apparantly the recent reports of redheads going extinct is incorrect. Phew as a redhead it saddened me to consider the extinction of our kind.

Growing up so many of my heriones were redheads; Anne of Green Gables, Caddie Woodlawn, Pippi Longstocking, Nancy Drew (strawberry blonde)

They were always headstrong, independant, one of kind, headstrong and heartstrong. I remember as a kid thinking kids did not like redheads but old people sure did. My sister and I would get so many compliments from older folks, as if being a redhead was something special from a bygone era. I was too young then to understand the appeal of those actresses like Anne Margret and Rita Hayworth we wanted to be Oliva Newton John or one of Charlie's Angels. Of course kids would tease us about our red hair, carrot top, red rum, etc. but they'd also tease about other things and tease kids with glasses etc.

Sine I've been an adult I've twice been in situations twice were someone said something about not being attracted to redheads I've had far more of the opposite with people who seek redheads out. Of course for the last 20 years or so I've loved being a redhead and my brown haired mom and sister have over the years become redheads too.

Here are some of my other favorite redheads:


Pheonix kim possible jessica rabbit Daphne

Wilma Bubbles

chick lit mystery series - reviews

They say all English Majors will end up reading mysteries and I thought no way too scarey, not interesting and here I am...addicted. I read or listen on my ipod to the following mystery series, I tend to go for chick lit mysteries that are funny, romantic and not too gorey. Here are some of my favorite protaganists and writers enjoy.

Stephanie Plum Series- by Janet Evanovich ex. One for the Money, Two for the Dough etc...
These are the ones that started it all for me. My mother, sisters and now a few friends have all gotten bitten by the Plum bug. Stephanie is a bailbonds woman from Trenton New Jersey and has a cast of hysterical characters who help her bring in her perps. She just released book 15 Finger Lickin Fifteen...http://www.evanovich.com/

Sophie Katz Series - by Kyra Davis ex. Sex, Murder and a Double Latte....
These are probably my favorite and the minute she writes a new one I'm reading it. Sophie is half black, half jewish native San Franciscan. Her friends are true San Franciscan's; one owns an adult sex store similar to Good Vibrations, one is a gay hair dresser, her boyfriend is a russian private eye and all the stories feature San Francisco locations and has a San Franciscan air. Love her! She's just released book number four... http://www.kyradavis.com/


Charlotte Wren Series - by Stephanie Bond ex. Body Movers, 3 Men and a Body...
This is my newest find and I'm addicted! Charlotte lives in Atlanta Georgia and when she was 18 and her brother only 8 her parents left them and skipped town to evade criminal charges against her dad. So she's raised her brother by working at Neiman Marcus and now he's 18 and gets into lots of trouble etc. I like it becuase she has sex with more than one person, she has real problems and the people around her are not perfect by any means. Every book leaves you hanging to get to the next one. There are 6 books so far and I'm on number four, can't wait to read the rest... http://www.stephaniebond.com/

Sofie Metropolis Series - by Tori Carrington ex. Dirty Laundry, Foul Play...
Sofie Metropolis is a Greek- American living in Queens next to her huge Greek family. She has a lot of greek food in these books that sounds amazing. There are four books in the series now. http://www.sofiemetro.com/

Heather Wells Series - by Meg Cabot ex. Size 12 is Not Fat, Big Boned...
Love Heather Wells, she is an ex mall pop star who now works at a NYC University as an assistant dorm director. She writes little songs to start her chapters which are funny and she has the usual interesting cast of characters. Meg Cabot is the author of the Princess Diary series and other young adult books so the releases of Heather Wells novels are unfortunately few and far between. There are only three in the series right now.
http://www.megcabot.com/size12/size12isnotfat.php

Hannah Swensen Series- by Joanne Fluke ex. Chocolate Chip Murder, Strawberry Shortcake Murder
Hannah Swensen owns a cookie store in Minnesota and solves mysteries. These are as light as you can get, fluff novels that harken back in time as Hannah is dating two men but does not do more than kiss either. It's a little to precious at times but I like the people she writes about in the area. http://www.murdershebaked.com/books.htm

Lt. Eve Dallas in Death Series- by JD Robb ex. Glory in Death, Ceremony in Death...
The fun part of these novels is the setting is 2060 and cancer has been cured, people live till 150 or more, people vacation off planet etc. I enjoy what the future looks like but the characters are a bit tortured by their inner demons and I sometimes want to shake them. It was surprising at first to find that JD Robb is actually Nora Roberts and I'm reading Nora Roberts books but I like her now. I've read about 6 and there are 25! in the series..... not sure how many more I'll read.
http://www.noraroberts.com/jdrobb/

Sookie Stackhouse Series - by Charlaine Harris ex. Dead until Dark, Club Dead etc...
This is the inspiratin for the True Blood series on HBO. The storylines in the show are very different than the books but a lot of the same characters and that very cool sourthern vibe. Sookie is a mind reader who lives in Louisianna and dates a Vampire. Vampires have "come out" of the coffin and can live off synthetic 'true blood'. These are fun and a bit more gorey than I usually go for but the she loves him she loves him not is getting a bit old and I stopped on book 5 and there are nine in the series.
http://www.charlaineharris.com/bibliography/bibliog-sookie.html

Enjoy reading...

getting rid of stuff

Okay my friend Susie H is going to be delighted to hear I finally cleaned my closet (which is actually a little room) and got rid of all the shoes that hurt my feet, or had worn down heels, or it's impossible to walk in. I got rid of them even if they were only worn once. I got rid of purses that I hand't used in the last year and got rid of every t-shirt or tank top that had a stain on it!

I'm pretty obsessed with organization magazines, shows, books. Here's what I've picked up from all this research.

1. Don't organize and clean at the same time, you'll never finish cleaning. To tackles a big mess start but straightening it up and making it look clean, even if that means making a box of stuff you'll go through to organize. Once the room looks better you'll have a lot more energy to organize and de-clutter.

2. Go with what feels natural. I once read that if you naturally put the mail on the table everyday although you've made a space for it in the office, put a basket on the diningroom table for mail, you won't retrain yourself most often.

3.If you haven't used it in a year you don't need it.

4.Sentimental things aren't really doing much for you in a closet or box, make a small part of that object. Although this one doesn't apply to me much, I'm much more about does it please aesthetically than if it's sentimental.

5. Read or review things only once! This is my favorite, why look at mail once then again to decide what to do with it. Look once and make an action, recycle or put in a bill pile. Same with email, answer immediately if you can then you won't waste time reviewing again.

That's all i know folks!

oh so raunchy i'm laughing my head off

Okay i'm supposed to be cleaning my closet which is strewn with clothes...really bad..something needing Clean House help...but instead i'm watching Kathy Griffin's "My Life on the D-List". She's shopping with Paris and.....

Kathy says something about her mouth looks like "Hey do you want a blow job?"

Paris "Oh I never do that. My mom taught me only ugly girls have to get on their knees and do that. I'd never give a blow job."

Kathy "Me neither and I'm not taking it up the butt again either now."

Later Kathy says to the camera, "Wow I'm off the hook forever! I'm never giving a blow job again. In fact from now on they'll blow me. Next time I have sex I'll strap on and say 'Hey Blow Me'."

She's freakin' hysterical. Oh and Kathy's mom in charge of her facebook page... peeing my pants!

This is not the exact part but this was funny too...

great wedding vows!

Well it's a long story but I found this today and thought it was beautiful.

Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward's wedding vows:

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the Art of Marriage: The little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say 'I love you' at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through all the years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding room for the things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

lesbians and the pro-choice movement a thought

I've been wondering about this for awhile and admit my argument could be flawed becuase I'm not currently inolved with pro-choice movement (except with my vote) and know very few women of college age. My theory is lesbian women are no longer as deeply involved in the pro-choice movement as they've moved their energy towards gay rights at an earlier age.

My logic is this, more and more I see young women declaring their sexuality in high school and at younger ages than it seems of lesbians in the past (generalization here not true for all). This stands to reason less and less lesbians live a hetero-experience first, perhaps less aware of the issues that hetero women face. Also more and more lesbian visibility has resulted in feminism and women studies discussing lesbian issues more and not assuming all women have the same issues (with a more global mindset as well). I also know that the history of feminist movements had alienated some lesbians by asking them not to step forward as the face of movements so as not to alienate the general public. This made lesbians move toward their own issues which allowed them to express their full selves.

Now the question is the pro-choice movement hurting from the lack of energy from lesbians who give thier time and money towards gay marriage and family rights? I'm not saying it is the job or that is a problem, just somethign I've wondered about. I'm sure their are a multi-tude of reasons but whatever the reason the pro-choice movement looks to be in trouble. Parental consent for abortion is now the law in more than have of states, there are many states where women must cross one or two state borders to get to a facility that performs abortions. The anti-choice movement seems to continue to be well funded, powerful and the killing of Dr's from their extremist arm continues to take choice rights away from women.

Maybe this is just from afar because at 41 my circle is more concerned with adoption rights, reproductive issues due to being older moms. Of course I do have teenage girls in my life who in california assume that they have abortion rights and will always have them.

stories i'm following - crazy that I am

While everyone else is following the Iran elections which I do hear about it's not what i'm googling and finding a place to make a comment. No I find the weirdest stories and like bees to honey have to get to the details of a crazy story. Currently following....

Anti-Abortion blogger who became the darling of the anti-abortion movement by blogging about her pregnancy with a terminally ill child. It was later uncovered that she had lied and wasn't pregnant and didn't give birth etc. She was caught when she showed pictures of "baby April" and it was one of those 'true to life' baby dolls and one of her followers recognized the doll.

Pictures here... http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/story?id=7827909&page=1

She apologized for her deception here http://littleoneapril.blogspot.com/

Sorry I'm not very gracious but while I think she needs help her audience isn't one I have any sympathy for. Especially with the recent killing of Dr Tiller.

************

Second story i'm following. Oklahoma Trooper who tried to choke an EMT who was on his way delivering a patient to the hospital. From all videos I've seen this Trooper is full of rage and a racist. The EMT clearly says "Okay follow me to the hospital and arrest me there." This trooper is so full of RAGE and his own self importance. http://jalopnik.com/5291548/oklahoma-trooper-stops-hospital%20bound-ambulance-assaults-emt

I actually have no general dislike for cops, they are the first ones I'm calling in an emergency and I do feel they see the worst of humanity so that must take a toll, but this man appears to have no desire to help only relishes his power. He has been put on "paid leave" and I"m following hoping to see him fired.

****************

Last story is a bit silly but had to look up and follow after seeing something about it, this girl who says she only asked for 3 star tattoos and woke up with 56 stars. I find this highly unbelievable because usually you agree to a payment ahead of time (big difference in payment for 3 vs 56 stars) and falling asleep while having face tattooed? That seems unlikely as the face would be painful I imagine.

Now I have to admit looking at the tattoo artist gives me no faith that he had any good judgement either.. he's freaking scarey looking which probably doesn't help his case regardless of how innocent.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/06/17/2009-06-17_teen_sues_over_face_tattoos_.html

Yep this is how I spend my valuable time....

The 11 day Detox Diet - ignore if you hate diet talk

I know I actually abhor diet talk, it can be tedious and preachy...so i'll try to be quick and insightful.

I did the Fast Track Detox diet with 5 of my co-workers. It consists of 11 days of no sugar, alcohol, caffeine, wheat, dairy.... basically you eat very lean proteins and loads of cruciferous veggies like cauliflour, celery and some fruits like berries. On day 8 you fast just drinking this watery juice concotion. So while I'd slit my wrist if I had to live like this forever I learned a few really great things.

1. The amazing benefits of flaxseed (oil or milled seeds), cranberries, cinnamen, nutmeg, ginger, garlic and whey. I will continue to use these regurarly in ways new to me or before never tried. I'll try to find a way (adding it to cereal or yogurt or on veggies) to use flaxseed daily. Try putting natural no sugar added cranberry juice in your water too.

2. Hunger passes. Although not the ideal really hunger does goes away. The fast day you'd be really hungry then it would pass and you wouldn't be hungry again for hours.

3. I don't need nearly as much caffeine as I thought. I didn't fall asleep at 2 or 3 from not having my usual diet coke. I've never had so little caffeine in my life and feel fine and awake.

4. Stress does not have to equal bad eating. When I'm really stressed I come home and am like let's order out and I need ice cream. Well the last week was very stressful at work and I didn't give in to bad eating so there are other options. (we walked the dogs and i did a lot of cooking and some yoga -dont tell anyone i don't want them to think i'm falling for their berkeley organic cotton ways).

5. I LOVE BREAD and CHEESE. Take away dessert and bring me a baguette! I'll never eat a fry again just let me have me some sharp cheddar with my apple.

So what happens now? The book actually suggests you stay on this forever with some modification (no freakin' way)! As my friend Braun says "People who don't eat carbs are loose cannons!"

• What I will do is incorporate more good foods to replace bad. More fruit and veggies - less crap.
• Pay attention to portions. Don't deny the craving but make it a taste or small part of a healthy meal.
• Buy more organic produce and the really good organic eggs, she scared the bejesus out of me, organic it is.
• Know that I have a lot of willpower! Not everyone could remain on the diet and I did! Go Deanna!!

For more details ask me and the book is The Fast Track Detox Diet http://tinyurl.com/nf62kq it's $10 at B&N.

BTW - you can lose up to 14 lbs (i didn't weigh myself so don't know) and my skin looks really good.

love advice...don't do what i've done!

Rules for dating and love, I've made all the mistakes so you don't have too!

1. Listen to your family and friends if they give you the veto. Some people are better at telling you how they feel about your partner but if they are asking you if you are happy with concern or indicate they don't want to be around your partner, probably not the best mate for you. They may not know your partner but they know you, they know when you are at your best and when you are not and they can read your happiness. Ahhh if only I'd listened sooner!

2. Sex does not equal love! I know it's the old joke about lesbians moving in on the second date but I can't tell you how often this really happens. Sex is fake intimacy, so it feels like you know someone well or that you are close when you haven't spent the time to really bring about the kind of closeness it takes to make a relationship last.

3. You will remember the beginning forever. For the next 20 years or 20 months you'll be hearing "How did you meet?" make it memorable and drag it out.

4. Your new love's families or attitude towards family matters. My parents used to ask us when we were teenagers about our friends parents. We'd say "why does that matter?" Ah I get it now. In general people generally get more like their parents as they get older (as they do things their parents did like get married and have kids they replicate their parents attitudes in those areas). Now there are examples where someone so hated their childhood they do the exact opposite. So meeting their family or discovering how they feel about their family shows you what they will be like or the opposite of how they will be.

5. Is this somoene you should commit to forever? Ask yourself these questions:

• Imagine you are old and sitting in a rocking chair on a front porch, your new love is next to you, how do you feel?
• Imagine your mother or father, or their mother or father needs to come and live with you for 3 years, how do you both deal with this?
• Imagine you have a child with your partner and the child grow up to be exactly like your partner, are you happy about this?

Now I must admit I got this little test from some women's magazine, but i've read thousands of magazine articles and this is the only test that ever stuck with me, I actually think it's quit good. Negative answers you may want to rethink whether this is a valid long term relationship.

6. Work vs Easy. Recently a love curious teenager recently asked me how hard are relationships? What percentage is hard and what is good. I thought about it and said your relationship is less than 70% good 30% work its not worth it. Reallly it should be closer to 80-90% good and 10% work.

Lastly never say never. Love and lust makes us stupid and break all our rules all the time.

flowers that look like cupcakes, fruit that looks like flowers....

I don't get this trend give flowers that look like a cupcake

or fruit that looks like flowers. If I got flowers that looked like a cupcake I'd just want a real cupcake and I don't like the idea of fruit that someone has touched to make look like a flower. Seems like flowers, fruit and cupcakes are already the good stuff just the way they are. Why don't they make the bad stuff look like flowers and cakes...like parking meters, credit card bills, strip malls. I'll take my cupakes with buttercream frosting and sprinkles!

men behaving stupidly

Recent history has shown you time and time again that you will get caught.
If you are a person that is in the media they will find out. DOH!

Not even the possible loss of career, money and reputation keeps these men in-line.
Jon Gosselin of Jon and Kate plus Eight is one of the most famous dad's in America!
His wealth and fame are dependant on his being the best dad in america. But no, he finds time (shockingly) to have an affair with a 26yr old. There are videos of him leaving her house, if you are famous people will tape what you are doing!

Jon getting caught gives me some happiness because they are SUPER religious and belong to the Assemly of God evangelical church. They gave their kids bible action figures http://tiny.cc/JogQy for Christmas. It was so funny and kinda cute to see these little 3 year olds, I'm Moses watch out…


Of course I was sad to watch this happen to John Edwards and really not smart on his part. It's obvious after hearing from about his mistress she was a loose cannon, and when you are running for office they will find your mistress who is living with your ex
staff member. It wasn't too hard to connect those dots. DOH!

New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer paid for sex so there was a money trail, Ted Haggard of church who preached monogamy and gays are sinners, slept with escort Mike Jones who eventually did right by his community beause of the negative preaching by Ted Haggard.
Where are they now? Eliot Spitzer says his days are joyless. http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2008/09/so_what_does_eliot_spitzer_rea.html John Edwards career is over and his reputation ruined. Ted Haggard reputedly broke but somewhat "cured" by the therapy his fellow evangalists gave him to knock the sinful gay from him.

I will say this is rare for women to lose their jobs, reputation from sexual activities. Recently country sweetheart LeAnn Rimes was unfaithful but it didn't hurt her, the general attitude is "she married young, and he's HOT!" But entertainment industry careers survive cheating all the time. Jude Law, Robin Williams, Hugh Grant, Woody Allen have all admitted affairs without any career repercussions. Hollywood is not using their morality as a badge so when we discover indiscretions it doesn't surprise. Mel Gibson will be interesting as he's been "mr catholic" and I'm pretty sure adultry and divorce aren't part of a good catholic regimen.

Maybe we just don't have enough women in politics and positions of moral authority to make the same mistakes. Although I somehow think women would use more brain, commen sense, restraint when their career and livelihood were on the line.

where have all the chunky girls gone

Yesterday I was flipping through channels and saw an old Janeane Garofalo stand up show. She was looking a bit grungy in t-shirt and cordorys. I was so happy to see her and thought "Good ol' Janeane, she's remained true to herself." As the show went on I realized the jokes were about Mr not Ms Clinton and that the routine may be a bit old. I googled Janeane and low and behold this very thin gaunt looking woman. "NO not Janeane, she was the hold out! She told Hollywood to f themselves, she was brains and wit first, looks second." She now joined the cadre of "chunky" women who look more and more like bobblehead dolls a their heads wobble on their tiny bodies. Margaret Cho, Kate Winslet, Christina Ricci, Ricky Lake.

They weren't even real world chunky, they were hollywood chunky which means they defied the standard size requirements for success in the spotlight. They seemed to be saying they would succeed on their own terms, they knew we liked them the way they were...or maybe they didn't.

I blame the award shows with their red carpet coverage. Now there is a red carpet for every event and actresses drag themselves down the entrance posing for the photographers looking as if they'll need a transfusion at the end to give them the strength to go on.

And now who do we have? Who will defy the never thin enough standards of beauty in Hollywood? America Ferrera seems to be downsizing at a rapid rate. Jessica Simpson, although veering towards chunky at times, is hardly stereo-type defying!

Adele, singer from Britian, it's all on you. Now that she's making appearances in the US I give her six months before I add her to my bobble head collection.

The New Social Anxiety - Questions of Facebook Etiquette

So you finally mastered email etiquette, no all caps, use correct grammar, re-read the 'to field' several times before sending and above all else never go near the 'reply all' button. You can text b4n and cu l8r like an ambidextrous twelve year old. Now the unknown rules but nagging anxiety about facebook etiquette leave you afraid to leave your next status update. Here are but a few:

1. Am I leaving too many updates on my Facebook profile? Will people wonder if you have an actual life? How often is just enough to share all the witty insights I have but not appear too desperate? Hint: If your friends now know what you've had for breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday it is probably too often.

2. Will I be fast enough to untag that unattractive photos friends have posted? How is it your friends have such a vastly different criteria of what photos of you others should be exposed too? Keeping your profile carefully void of offensive photos is a never ending job.

3. Have I friended the wrong people? Now your mother, your boss and your conservative Baptist cousin from Ohio have become your friends. Will they balk at the real you? Hint: 'Just got out of bed at 2pm due to too much fun at the Owl last night. Oh my aching head. Where are my underwear?' No longer the updates you can leave once your audience has broadened to work and family.

4. Will my friends be forced to add some lame application if I send them 'a drink, a hug, a rose, some Flair'? Is it really a gift if they have to add some application to their account they will never want to use again? Will they blame you for the ever growing list of updates they have yet to act upon.

5. Am I a stalker? You aren't facebook friends with your ex but you have friends who are, so you troll their pictures and profiles hoping to see comments or photos of your ex in their profile. Bonus if you find your ex looks miserable, fatter, older than you remember. Hint: If you spend more than 5 hours a week at this activity you are a stalker.

6. Did I kill that conversation? You follow a funny conversation between someone you kind of know and insert a witty comment and the conversation ends...did you kill it? Maybe you misunderstood what they were talking about? Maybe it was an inside joke that you weren't invited too? Hint: You'll never know.

7. What is my new commitment to my newly refound high-school, college and summer camp friends? After exchanging marital status, kid status, job and location status and maybe taking an odd trip down memory lane what is my commitment to old friends? Do we now exchange phone numbers and talk? Do I need to comment on their childrens pictures througout the year? Hint: No longer have the lost contact excuse for lack of communication effort.

8. Is it cool to continue a Facebook conversation with your friends when you are actually face to face? You see a friend at a party and the first thing you say is "I saw on facebook you got a new tattoo let me see!" She responds, "You won't believe who found me the other day!" Hint: If Facebook is mentioned no less than 30 times at a social event you know you all need to get out more often.